Jul 18, 2008

movin along...

As of today my wonderful man and I have been together a year and a half. We've lived together a year this month and next month we're moving into a 2 bedroom so we can actually have an office. I'm so excited! Everything is really starting to look up. I'm trying to keep myself in check w/ my attitude and what effects me. Right now tho, things are going good. I'm super excited about getting back to school, we've decided since I got my license back and everything that I can look into when I can go back to school! YAY!! I only have about 9 weeks of Massage left and have to make up 2 associate classes, and I might be able to do those online. If so, I'm going to try and knock those out too.

Another great thing, is I got my schedule for the next 2 weeks and I get to coach both weeks. wOoT! I'm so excited, no phones for me. I guess that means either I'm doing good coaching, or I suck at taking calls haha. Either way, I don't care lol, I'm coaching! *happy dance* wOoT!

Okay well, I have another blog I'm going to put up later... kinda sentimental lol but I think it will be good.

Thanks for reading!
Sarah!

Jul 17, 2008

Love will keep us alive.



I don't get why people can't put the color/gender/sexuality behind and realize we're all equal. My hope is one day America really will be free.

Jul 15, 2008

Political Bullshit

So I'm not big into politics at all really lol. But recently have been watching a lil more msnbc lol. I believe it was their economics advisors that were being interviewed the other day, I noticed that when Obama's was asked a question or addressed she would explain Obama's reasoning behind certain things and helped me understand more about his campaign. McCain's seemed to only knock down Obama's ideas and things the other lady was saying, Obama's advisor did a great job I think of defending Obama and promoting his campaign. A hell of a lot better than McCains at least.
Today when I woke up McCain was about to speak in New Mexico. When he finally does the first thing he starts talking about is quoting something Obama said and pointing out a contradiction that Obama said. What a hypocrite.
I'm thinking, I want someone to tell me why I should vote for them, not why I shouldn't vote for the other person. I also noticed... McCain has to have A LOT of neck pain for how often he looks down at his little piece of paper. Can he not address the crowd/camera's and the people listening. Obama looks around and is about making you hear listen to his ideas and reasons he should be elected. If he wants my vote so bad, he'd tell my why, and try to convince me to vote for him, not try to convince me not to vote for the other person. I don't know. It's going to be my first time to vote, I'm pretty excited, and pretty sure I'm voting Obama.

Jul 9, 2008

females suck....

I've always hated women. Even tho being one myself, I understand it doesn't make a lot of sense. I grew up in a small town, my graduating class was about 120. Since I started 1st grade there, I always had more dudes as friends than girls. I noticed the looks other girls gave me if I didn't have the newest shoes or jeans on, but I never got that from the guys. Middle school came and I began wondering if I'd ever get boobs like everyone else around me, all the girls got boyfriends, and I just had 1 boyfriend in 5th grade, I wasn't all about the boys, around that time my parents where going through a divorce, I guess you could say I didn't focus on things most girls my age did. I grew up at the lake and at the race track, not so much girly action going on there. Since I didn't blossom like other girls in middle school, and didn't wear everything they did, I wasn't in the popular crowd (and didn't really give a fuck), it was just me and my crew when high school hit, So by then I pretty much hated females.

Through my 4 years of hell in high school I had totally, 2 boyfriends. I later found out that it went around that I was a lesbian, because I didn't hang with all the girls, and never dated the losers I went to school with. I was in the high school band which of course didn't help my 'image' which I never cared about anyway. When I first hit high school I was really getting into music, and because of my appearance I got more shit, because I didn't wear what the other girls were wearing, I wore whatever was comfortable, usually jeans and a tshirt. I didn't chase after boys, I just hung w/ em, skipped school, and chilled w/ them in detention basically. Guys aren't complicated, they don't check the mirror 50 fuckin times a day, they don't talk about how that guys shoes doesn't match his outfit or whatever, they talk cool shit lol. Well I did finally get boobs, bigger than a lot of the girls I ended up graduating with (what now bitches lol)

Okay, so don't get me wrong, I did have some chick friends, my best friends Sarah and Misty really helped me find myself in high school. After graduation I have been back to that shit hole town only a few times to visit people that mattered to me. I mainly didn't get along w/ the girls I graduated with because sadly enough I knew a lot of them since first grade. So I came out of high school w/ a bad attitude toward other females, b/c the ones I went to were mainly spoiled, judgmental, and backstabbing.

After high school I ran into someone that I once considered a friend in high school at one point, until they literally quit talking to me... for what reason I'm not exactly sure, from what I can tell, I guess I wasn't good enough since she started to hang out with an individual that not only was just like described above, but her voice was like a 2 year old, and she would whine all the fucking time. So shortly after graduation (she actually dropped out like a few months before) a friend, that was still friends with her, for some reason brought her to my house, and suprisingly enough she apologized, admitted it was shitty, she was a bitch, and said she missed me. I'm usually a pretty understanding/forgiving person, which was my downfall. I went w/ her and my other friend to her b/fs house, and partied. This is where the summer after graduating starts to slip from me. We hung out... all the time, and partied. I was just out of a relationship so hell yeah I was all for it. Since I was out of high school and the relationship I was just ready for a less drama filled life, because as much as we try, we can't escape the high school drama. So long story short, my 'friend' ended up living w/ me and when we realized summer was half was over and we needed jobs, we went to the local amusement park, and we were hired on the spot.

Fast forwarding about a month into this job, the 'friend' starts to date a coworker. Now, living w/ my mom is not bad at all, she pretty much let us do whatever, just didn't want us out until 4 am all the time, which I totally understood. But 'friend' however wanted to stay out all night w/ her new boytoy. So whatever we still hung out but she just wouldn't listen, I tried explaining to her that, if she wanted to still live there that she should be careful b/c I know my mom and she wouldn't hesitate to through her out if she is out all night and still barely putting in for bills etc. So my mom kicked her out, and she quit talking to me. We still worked together, even on rides right beside each other, and it took her some time to actually come talk to me. She tried to say she wasn't mad, but then never talked to me after that. That was...... summer 06. I started college that fall, apparently shortly after she was knocked up and now has 2 kids, lol anyway.

My college was mainly women, but had quite a few older women in some of my classes. I never really had issues w/ anyone in college except some crazy girl that my b/f's best friend was dating lol but thats irrelevant really. If we move to Decemeber, my friend from the army was in town now SHE is cool lol. We met at the previous summer job. So when she is in town we like to hit up the club and go dance. Now I have to say this b/c we were going in DECEMBER where it would be in the 20's in the evening and yet there are still girls walking around half naked! I dunno I guess I just don't get it b/c I didn't go to the club to pick up random guys, I just went to shake my thang lol. Well one night we went to a local pool hall called magoos and we were coming out of the bathroom and this guy stops my friend and we start talking. While we're talking I'm pretty much thinking I'm wasting time b/c they stopped my friend, not me, so no way am I gonna get asked anything. To my surprise, after getting asked a few normal questions like age, etc, he points at me and asks for my number, w/ a lil hesitance I gave it to him. I got a text the next day, and its been history since.

Now you might be wondering wtf this has to do w/ hating females, but hold on we're getting there. The wonderful man who asked me for my number is staring at me across the desk. <3 Now, hes a few years older, so he has more life experience... and an ex. Yeah, an x BITCH. I try not to wish death upon anyone, except her and 2 other people lol. But what I don't understand how someone could be so crazy. I know you're probably thinking well you've only heard his side, well that and his moms. Not going into details, but this woman is a horrible mother, and horrible person in general. I've never met her but she has taken so many things from me. I was told that she possibly could want to get in touch w/ me to me of my fiance, but I pray she does b/c I have so much to say to her, but in the end she's not worth it. I've come to realize the type of person she is, if she does get in touch w/ me, I know it will be just to try and piss me off and to leave my amazing man. But she has another thing coming. She has put him through so much shit he just doesn't deserve. So yet, my last, and recently main point of hating women. All I have to say to her, is what goes around comes around bitch, you'll get yours one of these days.

what is it about music?

I don't know about anyone else but music is fucking awesome in my opinion. I didn't really start to get into music until I was 13/14, but ever since its been a passion of mine. My first real awesome concert was when my mom took me to see Evanescence when I was 14. It was amazing. Evanescence is one of the first bands where I felt connected to the music. If anyone is like me they know what I'm saying. Here is I guess the main reasons for my love of music.

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To me, that kind of explains it all. Music is expression, and most songs can tell a story. Whether its a story of love, hate, pain, or sadness, most songs can explain a lot if you just listen. Ever dedicate a song to someone because you just couldn't find the words to say what the song explains perfectly? lol. I just love the expression you can get from listening to some songs. Staind is one of my all time favorites, Aaron Lewis, is the king. His voice mixed w/ his lyrics, could make me cry if its the right song lol. I think its an awesome talent to be able to write something out, put music to it, and you can just feel the emotion w/ every word that is sang. So many times when listening to music I just zone out into the song. I'm not good at writing or expressing things w/ words, so for me to be able to connect w/ a song is just an awesome release.

There are songs I can listen to that just can take me back in time. One in particular is Into the Mystic by Van Morrison. I LOVE this song. My grandpa was a big Van Morrison fan and would listen to him a lot. I spent a summer at his house about 1 year before he died. This (listening to it now :D ) was the only song played at his funeral. It was a very sad day of course, and seriously this song gives me chills and tears almost every time I play it. Every time I hear it I remember him and everything about him, and it makes me sad b/c I miss him, but still just reminds me of how cool my g-pa was which makes me smile. For me I love how a song can capture that memory and emotion in it every time I hear it.

I listen to a variety of music, so for me, the ultimate deciding factors on if I like a song or not, are basically if its got good rhythm, maybe some good guitar shreds in there, if I can sing along, or headbang lol. The singer for me usually has to have a good voice, not always, but most the time. It sells a song for me if the lyrics follow the music and if the vocals are awesome, and real. I appreciate real talent, I have to say that I most likely would never go to a rap show, b/c from what I can see its the person and their 'crew' rapping along w/ the track, sure the main guy will do most of it while the crew throws in random 'uhs' and 'yeah' and occasionally will sing along w/ the track... Sorry I don't want to hear someone sing/rap over their own track... not too cool, just as if you were to lip sync.

There is nothing better than going to a show though. Nothing like being up front w/ the performers practically sweating and screaming in your face. I love the venue in my town called the Cains Ballroom. Its an old venue, w/ wood floors, that are spring loaded. You get enough people to jump it can be like a trampoline lmfao. But nothing like packing that place full of mother fuckers ready to rock out. The final touch for me is the live performance, if they sell it or not lol. I love the bands that get on stage and are just as ready to go crazy as you and that can just work the crowd. No one likes to just stand there staring at a stage of people standing in one spot, I don't think haha.

Well,
Thanks for reading!
♫♪Sarah♪♫

Jul 7, 2008

emo/scene

I came across this site the other day that, just caught my attention. The site was titled your scene sucks, It seemed like a game where you pick if you're an emo, metal head, whatever. I honestly didn't even pick a person lol. What truely inspired me to write about this site is mainly one 'hate' email the creator got that made me laugh... pretty hard.

" so your saying you dont believe in emo? WELL THEN YOU DONT BELIEVE IN EMOTIONS thats all it is people who like to express themselves not hide there emotions and pretend there tough when there sad they will show when they are in love they will show it when they are angry they will show it so dont tell me there is no such thing as emo "

The bolded line made me laugh the most. I'm thinking, WOW! Is he saying if you're not emo you don't show emotion? Bahaha. I wish I could email him. I personally don't label myself anything but myself, I try not to label or categorize others, but seriously, when you see a group of kids all wearing the hidious tight jeans, all w/ tshirts that could possibly be different but they're all band shirts from the same music genre, they all have the studded belts, crazy make up, and most them have crazy hair, or the same haircut as person next to them.... but yet this group claims to all be individuals. In my opinion, yes, everyone is different, but no, that doesn't make everyone individuals.

I'm proud to consider myself an individual, I dress in the same clothes I've had for awhile, yes they are mainly band tshirts, but they are from various genres. I haven't gone clothes shopping in the past year to make sure I get whats in style at that time. I shop at hot topic, but I like to shop gordmans, target, or aeropostal. I like to think I don't fit into a label. I will admit I don't shop at american eagle and hollister b/c I'm not going to pay 80 bucks for a pair of jeans or 30 dollars for a tshirt. I buy anything comfortable.

I will say that I do make fun of emo's occasionally for the very reason that they all look the same. And most are dolts like the one from the above statement. Many other emails I read were similar people crying about the site. I don't hang out with anyone really considered "emo" but from what I gather it seems to make them mad to get called emo or being made fun of for looking like one, but yet... isn't that what they called themselves, called... not call b/c like I said I dunno lol. But I do know that they need to learn some concert etiquette. I went to a red jumpsuit apparatus show. I like them, so I was somewhat near the front, then next thing I know some guy with pants tighter than mine lands on my head and we throw him to the ground. I look behind me and LITERALLY these kids are running and their friends are throwing them and launching them through the air, only to crash onto someones head. I'm thinking are you fucking kidding me? Crowd surfers piss me off enough, but atleast we can expect them somewhat and see them coming. If someone is being launched from behind me, I can't see that coming cause the mother fucker is flying in the air.... I can almost guarantee that at a metal show, people won't be that stupid.

I've gone to concerts for about 6 years now and have never been around so many idiots in one venue. I've been to shows and got sucked into a mosh pit and had compete strangers stop just to make sure I don't get hurt. I don't mosh much I like to watch the show lol, but it used to be common courtesy to watch out for others when your at a show, but now its like a competion to be the biggest jackass. *rolls eyes* Oh well.

Thanks for reading!
♫♪Sarah♪♫

Jul 3, 2008

new stuff

Decided to kinda of change up my blog. So deleted all the old shit, time for the new good stuff lol. I need some good ideas to write about lol. One thing I've been thinking about is reading this article the other day about some dome dick that jumped 2 fences to get his hat he lost on the batman ride at six flags in atl. Only to literally get decapitated by the ride. After reading this I'm thinking wow... but thinking more into I've had a couple thoughts...
1.) it may not be crossing traffic but I'd still look to see if a roller coaster was coming if I merely ignored the 2 warning signs on the fences I jumped to get to that point.
2.) what was his final thought? roller coasters are pretty loud, so you have to wonder when he heard it coming and what his thoughts were at that moment. I've been scared pretty bad before and I dunno that def would scare the shit out of me.
3.) what the witnesses saw/think. I don't know what I would do if I saw that, it would be like final destination right before my eyes. Def be something I'd never forget, and being on the ride, and possibly knowing at that moment the ride your on just took someone's head off, I don't know how well I would enjoy the rest of the ride if I knew when it happened.

Apparently that ride has hurt/killed people previously before. I've been on the batman at the six flags in texas which was fun but I dunno some things I just won't ride lol. Well thats it for my first mini post lol

Thanks for reading
♪♫ Sarah ♫♪